The circus of eating

June 30, 2009

Just like priming of a pump initially brings muddy water before pumping out cleaner water, my 6+ months of ¶”hoton pe aiseee baath mein dabakey chala aaya”¶ will continue to churn some eeeks-not-so-pretty work here.

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From an observationalist’s (†) point of view, today’s social outing made me wonder if people’s eating manners tend to fall into one or a combination of the following, leaving large deviations aside-

  • Tortoise chaap- The ones that belong to this category are the poster child of slowness/laziness. They make shapes and maps in their plates and end up mixing every combination in their plates.  They have only 1 meal a day, because their breakfast ends in the dinner time.
  • Atomizer- They believe in breaking the food particles into the tiniest bits possible, so that the addition of the food nuclei wont add to their weight substantially, and also to ensure that their digestive system has the least work to do.
  • Starvation Army- The last time they saw food was when they ate Farex baby food at the age of 4. More food is thrown around than eaten. No one knows what the hurry is for.
  • Eat thy neighbor- Some people cant keep their hands restricted to their own plate, but instead scan others’ food and insist on tasting (which often turns into sharing).
  • Calorie Counter- His patent for ‘weighing machine in flipflops’ is still pending.
  • Disturb-me-not: This man is on a mission, he is in his own world savoring every bite, and wont be disturbed even if there is a volcano eruption next door.
  • Reverse-engineers: Usually this is moms’ department where their sole aim is to recreate the exact dish by tasting and guessing the ingredients/procedure.

(†) Not sure if it means what I intend it to mean

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