how did you two meet?
July 6, 2007
Lately, I have been bumping into lot of desi couples. The first thing that shows hints of love-marriage (or love being the reason for their union, rather than the traditional arranged-turned-into love marrriage) is their PDA: they feed each other, they talk baby-ish, use excessively diabetic words like “honey” and “sugar”, and their talk is filled with cholesterol-filled ‘cheesy dialogues’. And I love to burst their bubble (e.g. guy: I wont eat till you eat, girl: I wont eat till you eat, me: awesome, so do I get all this food for myself?)
The first thing I ask them is how they met, so that I can maximize my chances. Answers are equally intriguing, and I am seriously not making these up:
Move aside get-togethers, bars and parties, book stores and coffee shops, schools and markets, here comes the internet.
” We met in a chat room”. Huh? Yes, Yahoo chat room. Can you believe that? Ok, I have been roaming in chat rooms since the birth of internet, from Arunachal Pradesh Singles’ to Zimbabwean Hotties’ chat rooms, and the only females interested in me are bots, males-posing-as-females, undercover FBI agents and friends playing pranks. I have absolutely no idea how cupid strikes in chat rooms. Shouldn’t one move away from internet and meet people outside anymore?
“Orkut is the reason we are together”. I kid you not. This couple met, fell in love and married after a brief Orkut “wanna frendsheep?” episode. Orkut’s main page says that I am connected to 61,087,463 people through x friends. Now 61 mln people out there, and what are the odds of me getting hooked up? Zilch. People at Orkut are mostly the journalistic sting-operation kind of friends that want to drill each other to death about “competition”, catching on to what “the friend is up to” and wondering why they haven’t heard from him since a long time. Well, here it is Sherlock: “you haven’t heard from xyz because he didn’t want you to..”.
But seriously, would it help if I join “I hate Barkha Dutt” community? who knows my life partner might be in “Tom and Jerry” community? or could it be the “Toyota Camry users” community?
“We caught the same flight and were going to the same destination, and thats how we ended up sharing the same path for the rest of our life”. Not exactly the same words, but you get the gist: Awwww.
Flight travel is rampant, and every time I fly, I share my row with either a baby who has both her hands in her nostrils digging up gold and asking me if she could have my window seat (ofcourse not!), or a desi woman yanking about her eldest son’s “1 crore rupees worth house in New Jersey”, her son-in-law’s “big position” in Microsoft and her grand kid winning 1st place in all-Texas-desis’ poem recital competition. Never has a Katrina Kaif woken me to ask if she could share the seat next to me, never did a female come running in an airport as I was about to board a flight (except for this one time, it actually happened.. I forgot to pay a female cashier at a coffee shop the exact amount and she came running to collect the remaining change, but that is different).
Wow, it surely is an eye-opener.